Fall down 8 times, rise 9

I've been struggling with making progress on this project lately. I have received a rejection letter from one agent, and haven't heard back from another. I've been more symptomatic lately, and when I'm dealing with my illness, I struggle with writer's block.

This project often feels like it is too much for me. Who am I to think I'm worthy of completing it? But I have been entrusted with people's personal stories, people who have been through unspeakable pain and want the opportunity to share their stories, and I cannot give up. I will finish this book, even if it takes years. I'll finish it, even if I have to self-publish it and then fail to sell any copies.

I read an article on traits that creative people often possess; you can find the article here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/03/04/creativity-habits_n_4859769.html

This excerpt of the article really touched me:

"Doing creative work is often described as a process of failing repeatedly until you find something that sticks, and creatives -- at least the successful ones -- learn not to take failure so personally.

"Creatives fail and the really good ones fail often," Forbes contributor Steven Kotler wrote in a piece on Einstein's creative genius. "

This reassured me that failure-be it a rejection letter from an agent or two weeks of failing to pen a single word-is part of the process.

I am challenging myself to work on my writing for an hour every day. That includes work on this project, on the novel I'm working on (which I have abandoned just as severely as this project lately), research for both projects, correspondence with agents and interviewees, and updating this blog. Progress is progress, no matter how slow. A blizzard is composed of snowflakes.

Intros to first 3 chapters are written! And info on the mania chapter

This morning, I put the finishing touches on the introduction to my chapter on mania and hypomania. This is the third chapter intro that I've completed; the first two chapters were on onset and depression.

I've read through what I have written, and I think that I've done a decent job. I always subject my writing to a rigorous editing process, so I am not done yet. But I have a nice start.

If you're curious about what is going into the mania chapter, here is a rough outline:

-DSM criteria for mania
-difference in criteria of mania vs. hypomania
-definition of mania and hypomania as high energy states
  >characterized by euphoria or irritability, decreased need for sleep, racing thoughts, and impulsivity
-in-depth description of the above energetic symptoms
-euphoric vs. dysphoric hypomania and mania
-the blurred line between mania and hypomania

Here is a one-paragraph excerpt on the energy that accompanies mania:

Whether it lasts twenty minutes or a year, hypo/mania can be seen as a period of unusually high energy. Hypo/manic patients typically can get away with very little sleep, often only four hours or less a night. Some manic patients can go days without any sleep. If you have a hard time imagining how someone can survive on so little sleep, think back to a time when you were very excited about something happening the next day. Maybe you had a promising first date, or were starting a new job. It was hard to sleep, right? Your mind raced with excited thoughts about the new developments in your life. Then you woke up before your alarm went off, ready to start this glorious new day. Severe mania is like living in this state of excitement all the time; sleep is unnecessary and hard to get. 

Overall, the intro to the mania chapter is a little over 1,200 words. I will attach 2-3 actual patient stories dealing with mania to the end of the chapter. If you have graciously allowed me to interview you, you can expect the questions on mania to come very soon; I decided to write the introduction before the questions so that I would have a better sense of what questions I need to ask.

Thank you for reading, and I hope that you all have a marvelous day!